?5 «^ ^ '5 






PLAYS FOR FEMALE CHARACTERS ONLY 

15 CENTS EACH 

p 

CRANFORD DAMES. SScenes; 1)^ hours 8 

GERTRUDE MASO]S", M.D. 1 Act; 30 minutes 7 

CHEERFUJL. COMPANIO]N'. 1 Act; 25 minutes 2 

LESSOIS" rN" ELEGANCE. 1 Act; £0 minutes 4 

MAIDEIS^S AEE FORLORN. 3 Acts; l^ hours 6 

MURDER ^VILE OUT. 1 Act; 30 mimites 6 

ROMANCE OF PHYLLIS. 3 Acts; l^ hours 4 

SOCIAL ASPIRATIONS. 1 Act; 45 minutes 5 

OUTWITTED. 1 Act; 20 minutes 3 

WHITE DOVE OF ONEIDA. 2 Acts ; 45 minutes 4 

SWEET FAMILY. 1 Act; Ihour 8 

BELLES OF BLACKVILLE. 1 Act; 2 hours 30 

PRINCESS KIKU. (35 cents) ... 13 

RAINBOW KIMONA. (25 cents.) 2 Acts; li^ hours 9 

MERRY OLD MAIDS. (35 cents.) Motion Song 11 

PLAYS FOR MALE CHARACTERS ONLY 

J5 CENTS EACH 

M 

APRIL FOOLS. 1 Act; 30 minutes 3 

BYRD AND HURD. 1 Act; 40 minutes 6 

DARKEY WOOD DEALER. 1 Act; 20 minutes 3 

WANTED, A MAHATMA. 1 Act; 30 minutes 4 

HOLY TERROR. 1 Act; 30 minutes 4 

MANAGER'S TRIALS. 1 Act; Ihour ,„ 9 

MEDICA. 1 Act; 35 minutes 7 

NIGGER NIGHT SCHOOL. 1 Act; 30 minutes 6 

SLIM JIM AND THE HOODOO. 1 Act; 30 minutes 5 

WANTED. A CONFIDENTIAL CLERK. 1 Act; 30 minutes 6 

SNOBSON'S STAG PARTY. 1 Act; 1 hour 12 

PICKLES AND TICKLES. 1 Act; 20 minutes 6 

HARVEST STORM. 1 Act; 40 minutes 10 

CASE OF HERR BAR ROOMSKI. Modi Trial; 2 hours... 28 

DARKEY BREACH OF PROMISE CASE. Mock Trial. 22 

GREAT LIBEL CASE. Mock Trial; 1 Scene; 2 hours 21 

RIDING THE GOAT. Burlesque Initiation; 1 Scene; li^ hours 24 

DICK & FITZGERALD, Publishers, 18 Ann Street, N. Y. 




RAPS 



% l^autieDiUe Mtt^ 



BY 

ELEANOR MAUD CRANE 

AUTHOR OF "BACHELOR MAIDS* REUNION," " BILLY 'S BUNGALOW," 

"JUST FOR FUN," ** IN THE FERRY HOUSE," "LITTLE SAVAGE," 

"LOST NEW YEAR," "MEN, MAIDS AND MATCHMAKERS," 

"NEXT DOOR," "PAIR OF IDIOTS," "RAINBOW KIMONA," 

"WHEN A MAN'S SINGLE," "YE VILLAGE SKEWL OF 

LONG AGO," ETC. 



Copyright, 191 i, by Dick & Fitzgerald 



^ 



NEW YORK 

DICK & FITZGERALD 

18 ANN STREET 



RAPS. 



CHARACTERS. 



Patrick O'Gorman Carpenter and Plasterer 

Jack McAllister One of the Boys 

Time of Eepresentation. — About 30 minutes. 



INCIDENTAL PROPERTIES. 

Bag of Carpenter's tools. Dinner-pail. Two Step-ladders. 
Board. Pipe. Flower. Monocle. Playing Card. Drink- 
ing-cup. Cigarettes. Matches. Two apples. Flask. Wrap- 
ping paper. 



TMP92-008961 



CCI.D 23936 



RAPS. 



SCENE.— Plain Interior. 

ENTER Patrick O'Gorman wearing overalls, and carrying 
hag of carpenter s tools and dinner-pail in one hand and a 
step-ladder in the other. He puts pail and hag upon the 
floor and proceeds to set up ladder, EXITS and returns 
with second ladder which he places several feet from the 
•first, EXITS and returns with hoard which he places 
across the tops of ladders whistling softly as he worJcs 
" The Wearing of the Green/' Mounts ladder, hag in 
hand, looks ahout, scratches his head. Seats himself on 
hoard, draws pipe from his pocJcet, lights it and proceeds 
to smoJce. 

ENTER Jack McAllister, slightly under the influence of 
liquor. Evening dress, flower upside-down in the 
hutton-hole of his coat and monocle dangling. He 
sways unsteadily as he comes forward. Looks down at 
hase of ladder then seats himself with difficulty upon the 
floor and removes low patent-leather shoes. Rises, shoes 
in hand, puts hand on side of ladder and one foot on 
lowest round as if to mount, 

Pat (who has heen watching Jack in open-mouth astonish- 
ment). Well, Oi'll bay domned. 

Jack (speaking in loud whisper and raising his finger to 
his lips). Shush. You'll wake the old woman. 

Pat (taking pipe from his mouth). Wake her? If she 
could be a-seein' of ye now, it's yer own wake ye'd be after 
attindin' Oi'm a-thinkin'. But ye're safe this toime, me bi. 
She's out. 

Jack (in surprise). Out? Thish hour night ? 'Mpossible. 

Pat. An' what hoour of noight air ye makin' it now ? 

Jack (looking sleepily at his monocle, shaking it and hold- 
ing it to his ear as if it were a watch). Shtopped again. 



4 Raps. 

That'sh worst 'f those scheap watches. However, makesh no 
difference. Know it's one clock. Heard clock strike's I came 
in. Struck one eight times. 

Pat. Eight ye air. It's eight o'clock. 

Jack {looking up at Pat). Mean t'say ishn't to-night? 

Pat. Sure an' it ain't. It's to-morry, bi', to-morry. 

Jack {leaning up against step-ladder and shaking his head). 
Then where the devil did t'day go? Shay, ol' man {looking 
up at Pat) 'f thish ish to-morrow who — who the deuce 
'm I? 

Pat. Search me. 

Jack {running his hands through his pockets). Got card 
shomewhere. Here 'tish. {Draws face card from pocket, 
gives it with formal how to Pat. Pat puzzles over card) 
Make it out? 

Pat. Sure. It's the Jack of 

Jack {interrupting him triumphantly). That — that'sh me. 
I'm Jack. 

Pat {reaching down to shake the hand which Jack stand- 
ing on tiptoe extends to him). And begorrah, Oi think 
Oi've seen you somewhere, before. „ 

Jack. 'Spect y'have. I go there 'casionally. {Puts hand 
in pocket) Have a drink? 

Pat {delighted). Wal, noow, that's something loike. 

Jack {taking drinking-cup from pocket, putting it together, 
and holding it out to Pat) Help shelf. {Looks up at Pat^ 
who is scowling down at him angrily) What — what you 
giving me such a nashty look for? 

Pat. Sure and ye've got a nasty look all right, but it ain't 
Oi thot gave it to ye. Whar's the loinin' to the coop? It's 
ez empty ez ye're full. 

Jack {making several vain attempts to light cigarette at 
last succeeding, then gravely tries to blow out cigarette and 
smoke match). Think I'm drunk, eh? 

Pat. You're a pretty gintleman! 

Jack. How the dev-devil d'you find that out? I shaid 
t'her t'night. I mean lasht night. Yes'day night, you know. , 

" Kathrine," shaid I, " yo're the prettiest girl I know and I 
love yer." She shaid, " Jack, 'fyou're gentleman, go home." 
Came home. Musht be gentleman. C. Q. D. No, C. O. D. 

Pat. So ye're in love, eh ? 

Jack. Yesh, in love. Very morantic. Booful girl. Boo- 
ful hair. Puffs, rats. Ain't 'fraid of rats either. Come 
down, ril tell y'all 'bout her. 9 



Raps. 5 

Pat (lighting his pipe). Can't do it. Got a job. Busy 
day. 

Jack. That's sho? Then I'll come up. (With his shoes 
in his hand J tries to mount ladder, swaying and slipping at 
every step. Stops half way up, looks at Pat) I shay, JuFet. 
I — I'm a devil of a Pomeo. 

Pat. You're a rum one, all right. If you could see your- 
self ez Oi see you 

Jack. That'sh nothing. 'Fyou'd see y'self as I she you, 
you'd be s'prised. You — you've got eight heads, big ones, 
shwell ones, going round and round. 

Pat. On the level, is thot square ? Well, Oi'll bay domned. 

Jack (with dignity). How dare you shware b'fore gentle- 
man? 

Pat (indignantly). How the divil did Oi know ye wanted 
ter sware furst? 

Jack (succeeding in reaching top of ladder, seating himself 
"beside Pat). 'Nother thing wish you'd be more careful your 
grammar in my preshence. 

Pat (indignantly). Whin it's mesilf whot took the proize 
fur parsin' at school. Didn't they larn me 

" Bedad an Oi am, Be jabbers thou art, 
Bejorrah, it's him. 

Who sez thot we ain't? 

Oi till yer, ye air. 

By domned but it's thim.'^ 

Jack (trying to put left shoe on right foot and gesticulating 
as he talks). Took prize self once for declaiming. Little 
chap. Four months old Kecited ditto. Thish way: 

Twinkle, twinkle, little star. 
Up 'bove trolley-car. 
Trolley-car ran off the track, 
Wish had me nickel back," 

Pat. See here, bi, ain't yer puttin' thim shoes on the 
wrong feet? 

Jack (looking ruefully at feet). But what ^m I going t'do 
'bout it. Theshe 'rail the feet I've got. Thatsh plain's 
A— B— C— 

Pat. Thin ye're D— E— F— 

Jack. Tell you I'm in love. That'sh trouble. Love! 
Love ish — well, love ish heaven. 

Pat. Love's hell. Guess Oi ought ter know. 



6 Rat>s. 

Jack. Been there? 

Pat. Sure. She wuz a peach. Bow-legged and cross-eyed 
so she couldn't look where she wuz goin' or go where she wuz 
lookin'. " Patsy, dear," says she the noight bayfore the 
weddin', " OiVe a confission to make, Oi'm a somnambulist." 
" Whist, Norah," sez Oi, " don't let thot bay after a-bortherin' 
yer. Ye kin kape your religion an' Oi'll kape moine." Ah, 
But she wuz a darlint! Foight? Why she bit a hole in my 
chake onct as big as yer two thumbs. Oi tuk her to the jidge 
ter hev her bound over ter kape the pace but (sighing) 
she'd swallowed it. 

Jack. What was row 'bout? 

Pat. She'd axed me ter stip out an' buy her a couple of 
egg-plants an' jist because Oi fetched her home two hens she 
flew at me. Thot wuz the furst toime Oi wint shoppin' fur 
her. Once she wanted me ter buy her a shirt-waist. Oi wint 
oop to the " Pittsburg Blond behoind the counter an' Oi sez," 
" Oi'd loike ter see some shirt-waists." " What bust ? " axed the 
girl without so much ez lookin' at me. " Oi' didn't hear 
anything," sez Oi, an' the Keely-Cured Brunette next her 
most split her sides laffin'. 

Nor ah wuz frum Philadelphy, you know, an' how she stood 
up fur thot morgue. " Philadelphy's a well-laid out city," sez 
she, " New Yark ain't in it wid her." " No, darlint," sez Oi, 
" New York ain't laid out ne^r so well ez Philadelphy, fur it 
ain't been dead so long." 

Sich a weddin' journey ez w i hed, Norah an' me. We wint 
by water. Furst day out it wuz foine — gorgeous. Nixt day — 
(Shaking his head) Disgorgeous. An' sich a gift o' the gab 
ez Norah had. Iverything thot wint in at her ear came out 
of her mouth. Oi'll give ye a tip, bi, there's three ways of 
spridin' news. Tilaphone, tilagraph, an' tilawoman, an' the 
last's the quickes'. 

Oi took her out ter dinner oust. " Will ye hev a cock-tail, 
fnrst," sez Oi. " No," sez she, " Oi niver could abide 
chicken. Oi want ter supprize me stummick whin Oi go 
ter a resterrant." So she took lobster, crab, blackberry-pie, 
an' peach ice-cream. She got her surp-oize all roight. My, 
my, but she wuz ill! 

Jack. Dan .erouslv so? 

Pat (shaking his head). Too ill ter be dangerous. Noth- 
in' iver bothers me loike thot. Oi kin ate the (w) hole of a 
doughnut without winkin'. 

An, she wuz a rare wan, wuz Norah. 



Raps. 7 

" You're gittin' a double chin, Norah/' sez Oi, " you'll hev 
ter diet." 

" Dye it? whot color? " sez she, quick ez a flash. 

Wance she fell an' broke her leg. Whin she got well one 
leg wuz shorter thin the ither. " Oi'm goin' to a Christian 
Science doctor," sez she, " ter git absint treatmint," sez she. 
Oi laffed at her, but sure enough wan mornin' she woke up 
an' found the short leg hed grown down same ez the ither. 
" Kun aroun' ter the doctor, Pat," sez she, " an' tell him 
Oi'm cured." But if Oi didn't lose the address, an' 
(Scratching his head) Be jabbers, her leg's growin' yit. 
She's a rare one is Norah. Whin the landlord told he wuz 
goin' ter raise her rint she told him she wuz gladj fur she 
couldn't raise it. 

Jack (pointing to Pat's bulging poclcets). What's in yer 
pocket, Irish? 

Pat. Thot, United States, is me lunch. (Takes a couple 
of apples from his pocJcet) Hev wan? 

Jack. Don't care if I do. 

Pat (hreaJcing open apple and examining the parts care- 
fidly). What's worse than foinding a worm in an apple? 

Jack. Finding two worms. 

Pat. Nope. Poinding half a wan. (Jack spits out 
apple) Say, bi, where do ye work? 

Jack. I'm taking a vacation. Boss said something I 
didn't like. Told me he wouldn't need me any more. So I 
left. Won't have any man talk to me that way. Used to be 
on Wall Street. 

Pat. Bull, bear, or plain jackass? 

Jack. I shay, how much longer do we hang out 'nthish 
here clothes-line? I'm dry 'nuff now. 

Pat. We work till foive, thin we're through. 

Jack. What ish it we're doing? I forgot. 

Pat. Sure'n we're after a-lookin' fur ghosts. 

Jack. We're doing what? 

Pat. Lookin' fur ghosts. Thot's' what yer owld woman 
seys whin she sint fur me. " Pat," seys she, " there's curious 
rappin's in these walls. An' Oi want you to foind out what 
it manes if ye hev ter tare doon the plaster. The place is 
hanted," seys she, " an Oi ixpict yer ter foind the hant." 

Jack (putting on his hat sideways and edging himself 
along the hoard until he reaches the ladder) Oh, But — But 
— I — I shay. I can't stay any longer, you know. Very 
presshing gagement. 



S Raps. 

Pat {edging after him and placing his hand on Jack^s 
shoulder). Wait a minute. Don't — don't lave me. (A rap- 
ping several times repeated is heard hack of them. Both 
start and shake) What — what the diviPs thot? 

Jack. I didn't hear anything. 

Pat (his teeth chattering), Nather did Oi. (Rapping) 
Mither of Moses, there it is again. 

Jack (stammering). If — if — you — you shake so — so hard, 
you'll joggle us both off. 

Pat. Oi tell ye what. You turn round an' say if iny- 
thing's back uf us. 

Jack. Turn round yourself. I'm not such a fool as I 
look. 

Pat. You couldn't be, me bi'. 

Jack. I mean you take me for a bigger fool than I am. 

Pat. Sure an' Oi couldn't do thot airther. 

Jack. I have it, we'll turn together when I count three. 
Now, One, two — (Mapping) D — D — Did you hear any- 
thing that time? 

Pat. Niver a rap. But Oi say, don't let's turn jist yit. 
Oi haven't finished me poipe. (Very loud and prolonged 
rapping. Pat drops pipe) Kape — ^kape still and it'll git 
tired an' quit. 

Jack. No, it won't. It — it'sh on to us. Besht thing we 
can do ish to make a racket. Eaish the deuce. Let it shee 
we're not scared. 

Pat. But — ^But — Oi — Oi — don't fale loike raisin' the 
deuce. Oi want ter bay quiet an' — an' sober an' think of me 
past loife. 

Jack. That'sh jusht it. You mushn't. Shout — sing — 
whistle. Go like an automobile. (They maJce an outlandish 
noise. Imitating as many things as possible, steamwhistles, 
sirens, fog-horns, and all the time the rapping continues 
getting fainter and fainter, finally stopping altogether.) 

Pat. Hooray, we win. (Mops his brow) Begorrah, but 
that's the toughest faive minutes I iver spint. 

Jack. What a fool y'are, Irish. Fraid y'own shadow. 
Look at me. (Draws himself up.) 

Pat. Hm. Oi notice ye ain't a-turnin' round. 

Jack. Think I'm scared too. Jusht watch me. (Turns 
partly around). 

Pat. All the way, mon, all the way. (Jack turns 
gingerly) Anything thar ? 

Jack. Of course not. 



Raps. 9 

Pat. (laughing), Oi knew thar wasn't all the toime. Wuz 
jist givinV ye a jolly. Noow let's see yer git doown the 
eseulator. 

Jack. Will you follow? 

Pat. Sure. Ye go ahead an' Oi'll proceed ye. Don't bay 
afraid, little wan. (Both edge to the end of hoard and start 
down ladder. Very loud rapping is heard and they fall the 
rest of the way, rolling over each other) Oi'm dead. Oi'm 
kilt 'intoirely, Oi'm knocked spacheliss. 

Jack. Hush. There's something behind all this. There's 
devilment somewhere. T shall investigate. First — (TaJces 
flask from pocket, drinJcs.) 

Pat. That's the proper spirit. 

Jack (giving flash to Pat). Put spirits down to keep the 
spirits up. 

Pat. Put the spirits in, keep the spirits out. 

Jack. And now for ghosts. (Buttons up coat) B'hold 
the charge of the Light Brigade. 

Pat. Will ye koindly not mintion me gas-bill so loightly. 

Jack (putting his hat on sideways and crossing his arms). 
Washington crossing the Rubicon, Napoleon crossing the 
Delaware. 

Pat (imitating Jack). An' Pat crossin' his eyes. 

Jack (seizes tools, runs up ladder, examines wall, from 
hehind which rapping again sounds louder than ever. Tears 
off strip of wall-paper which he holds triumphantly aloft.) 
I knew it. I thought as much. (Rapping stops as soon as he 
removes paper.) 

Pat. Sure, an' what hez thot ter do with it? 

Jack. Everything. What can you expect but rappings 
from a wall covered with (w) rapping -paper? 

(Parody^ Song or Dance.) 
CTJETAIN. 



VaudeviDe Sketches 

BERNSTEIN AND FIRESTEIN. 15 cents, a ,aud.viite sketch 

in Hebrew dialect for 2 male characters, by James F. Parsons. Tjmc, abo»2t 15 
minutes. Exceedingly funny both in ludicrous topics, Sheeney hits and droll repartee ; 
concluding with the song "Oh, My I Von't We Make der Mon^/ I " for which thv 
text and music are given. 

TWO WANDERING JEWS* is cents, a vaudeville sketch in 
Hebrew dialect, for 2 male characters, by Harry E. Shelland. Time, about 15 min- 
utes. Full of funny and catchy dialogue and repartee, and ending with a song. 

NEW CHAUFFEUR, The. 1 5 cents, a vaudeville automobile skii^ 
for 2 male characters, by Harry E. Shelland. Time, about 15 minutes. A Dutch* 
brewer hires an ignorant Irishman for chauffeur. A terrible catastrophe and a rac/ 
dialogue in which Pat gets the better of the Dutchman. Just too funny and leading 
up to dialect minstrelsy. 

MULDOON AND THE NIGGER ? or. White and Black, is 

cents. A dialect vaudeville Sketch for two males, by H. E. Shelland. Muldoon^ 
an Irish stage-manager, meets very suddenly y^^wj^//, a darkey, whom he wished to 
engage as an actor in a Mephistopheles drama. After a lot of funny characteristic 
talk, they rehearse Johnson s part. After some ridiculous attempts at highfalutin* 
tragedy, partly in very blank v^rse^ Johnson collapses. They close with a song. 

MA'S NEW BOARDERS, is cents, a farcical sketch in I act, by 
W. C. Parker. 4 male, 4 female characters. Mrs. Holdtight leaves her boarding* 
house in her daughter's charge. Prof. Alto-Gether calls a rehearsal of the village 
choir, but gives them the wrong address. The choir turn up at Mrs, H.^s and ars 
mistaken for new boarders. Then follows an uproarious series of incidents that end in 
the Professor s round-up. Can be played ** straight," or with specialties. Excellent 
chance for single or double quartette. No scenery required. Time, 30 minutes. 

PAPA'S BULLDOG, is cents, a farcical sketch in i act, by W. C. 
Parker, i male, 1 female character. The hero tries to "coach" his sweetheart in 
some private theatricals. Her ignorance exasperates him so completely that a furious 
^aarrel ensues. Unexpected consequences convince each that the other is crazy, and 
tne fun is brought to a cyclonic climax by the intervention of Papa's bulldog. The 
piece can be played " straight," or specialties may be introduced. Time, 30 minutes. 
No scenery required. 

AFTER TriE BALL, is cents. A vaudeville character sketch in x 
act, by Harry E. Shelland. i male, z female character. Scene, a jilain interior. 
Time, 20 minutes or longer, according to specialties introduced. A bright dialogue 
between a youth and girl of the old Bowery pattern, with disjointed remarks and rep- 
artee while dancing the two-step, and aff&rding opportunity for song and dance or 
other specialties. 

POINT OF VIEW, The. is cents. A sprightly comedy sketch, by 
Bell Elliott Palmer, i male and i female character ; time of representation, 20 
minutes, in which Elinor Jardine tries to convince Fred Winston^ to whom she is 
shortly to be married, that her conduct in regard to a former rejected suitor, although 
unconv^itional, is entirely justifiable. Fred confesses to a similar but pretended pro- 
ceeding with another young lady. Elinor's jealousy is so aroused that she calls down 
the engagement. He then proves that his flirtation is assumed merely to convince her 
that her point o/yiew is absurdly untenable, a fact which she is gladly compelled to 
admit. Reconciliation follows, of course. An illustration of the feminine " because " 
outwitted by masculine strategy. 

PROFESSOR'S TRUANT GLOVES, The. is cents, a comedy 

sketch, by Bell Elliott Palmer, x male and i female character. Time of repre- 
sentation, 20 minutes. A charmingly elaborated duologue, showing how a young lady 
of extremely womanly discernment smooths the way to a declaration of love from a 
man unaccustomed to women's ways, and so terribly bashful and diffident, that he mis- 
interprets all she says and does. A fetching example of womstnly tact and diplomacy. 



Plays for Male Characters 

WIDOWS PROPOSALS, The. is cents, a farce in I act, by W. 
D. Felter. 3 male characters — one impersonating an old woman, which is the lead- 
ing part. No scenery required. Time of playing, 30 minutes. An episode from 
"The Bedott Papers " that admits of low-comedy treatment, so that a succession of 
giggles will greet its performance from first to last. The author has produced this skit 
at scores of entertainments, and never yet failed to bring down the house with it. 

APRIL FOOLS* 15 cents. A farce in i act, for 3 male characters, by W. 
F. Chapman. Time, 30 minutes. For a half hour of roaring fun this farce has few- 
equals. It is brisk, bright and full of funny situations, and the characters are exceed- 
ingly well contrasted. Each imagining that the others are foolish, crazy or drunk, 
misunderstandings follow one another in rapid succession until, when everything is in 
a hopeless tangle, it is discovered that all three are the victims of a practical joker, who 
has made "April Fools " of them. No scenery required. 

WANTED, A MAHATMA* is cents, a comic sketch in I act, 
for 4 male characters, by Gordon V_. May. i interior scene. Professor Astralile, a 
fortune-teller, is in bad luck. Squire Babcock offers him a hundred dollars for a 
Mahatma. His friend, Frisby, an adventurer, disguises himself as a Mahatma. 
Squire puts his wallet on table. The temptation is too much for Frisby, who grabs 
the wallet. A struggle — the disguise falls off. Exposure and escape. 

HOLY TERRORt A* 15 cents, a farce in i act, by O. Wenlandt. 

imale characters — either white or black face. Plain room scene or no scene at all. 
ostumes to suit, except that of one character who is rigged out as a howling '' swell." 
Plays 30 minutes. Specialties can be introduced according to convenience and talent. 
The piece will make an audience laugh till they're tired. 

VANTED, A CONFIDENTIAL CLERK* is cents, a farce 

in I act, by W. F. Chapman. 6 maje characters, viz. : eccentric merchant with a 
weakness for proverbs, comic Irishman, *' dude," talkative *' sport," shabby genteel 
*' bummer" and the clerk who gets the situation. No scenery required. Time, 
30 minutes. A capital farce with scope for easy character acting, full of ridiculous 
situations, racy dialogue, comical "business" and spirited action. Shows a mer- 
chant's difl&culty in securing a satisfactory clerk, and creates unlimited merriment. 

MANAGER'S TRIALS, A* is cents, a farce in i act, by A. L. 
Fisher, for 9 male characters, viz.: theatrical manager, darky servant, "tough," 
dude, sta^^e-struck Dutchman, crushed tragedian, Irish policeman, and 2 comic female 
rdles C*high kicker" and old maid) to be played by male actors. Daniel Slowtnan 
advertises for a few more people for the " Fly by Night Folly Co." His encounters with 
the various stage-struck applicants who respond will make a mummy laugh. The piece 
is rich in opportunities for easy but telling character acting for 9 boys or young men. 

** MEDICA**' IS cents. A farce in i act, by W. K'. Engle. 7 male char- 
actei^ — 2 darkeys, 5 white faces. Scene, a doctor's office. Costumes to suit. Time, 
35 minutes. Runs with a snap from beginning to end — there isn't a slow part in it — 
and is sure to please. When originally played by the Amphion Minstrels, it elicited 
continuous screams of laughter from a delighted audience. It will bring down the 
house wherever played. 

SNOBSON'S STAG-PARTY* is cents, a farce in i act, by 
Lbvin C. Tees. 12 male characters, including 2 female impersonators. Parlor 
scene. Runs about i hour if played "straight " ; can be lengthened with *' special- 
ties" (which are provided for) according to talent. In giving his party Snobson 
invites the guests at random from the city directory. The guests arrive, including 
two ladies — white and black— who get in by mistake, and a hot old time ensues. 
Finally, Bill Ballotbox comes in with a brass band and a political delegation, and the 
fun culminates in a regular war dance. The cast includes a crusty old gent, gay 
youth, **coon," Dutchman, Irishman, Dago, Cockney, wench. Irishwoman, tough 
citizen, crushed tragedian, ward politician. The piece will fetch incessant roars of 
laughter, and can be made the medium of all kinds of " specialties." 

MISCHIEVOUS BOB* is cents, a comic drama in i act, for 6 male 
characters. Plain room scene. Time, 40 minutes. A taking farce for boys, marked 
by a serious, and even pathetic, as well as comic interest. The characters are true 
to nature, and the moral gilded with genuine humor, Bob 9boul4 be played by a 
fpull boy ; the size of the others is unimportant. 



Mock Trials, Initiations and Monologues 

MAN PROPOSES, BUT WOMAN DISPOSES, is cent.. 

A Sprightly and emotional Monologue by Lawrence D. Fogg, in which a young lady, 
on her birthday, endeavors by the guidance of letters and gifts from her numerous 
admirers, to decide on one of them for a husband. Her criticisms are witty and 
amusing, but she fails to make any selection. Why ? — Because. 

CONFESSIONS OF A MALE FLIRT, is cents, a monologue, 

by Lawrence D. Fogg, in which a bachelor, on the eve of his wedding, while burn- 
ing his love correspondence, recalls to mind some of the girls with whom he has been 
in love, with his hopes, his successes, and his disappointments. A strange medley of 
humor and heart-burnings, ending with a pathetic climax. Note — At the end, while 
the performer's head is buried in his hands, a procession may pass slowly by, repre- 
senting the girls he has been describing; similar in effect to the scenes in the 
" Reveries of a Bachelor." 

SHOW AT WILKIN'S HALL, The^ 15 cents, a comedy costume 
monologue for a lady, or gentleman in female costume, by Bertha M. Wilson. A 
*' Take-Off " on Delsarteans in 2 scenes • the second can be given without the first, 
being complete in itself. A sure hit. 

WAKE AT O'GRADY^ The. 15 cents. By William Sidney 
Hillyer. a monologue for an Irish character comedian. Runs 15 minutes. Besides 
the "wake," Mr. Du^an tells all about the christening at McGuire's, Especially 
recommended. 

CRUSHED TRAGEDIAN, A. 15 cents. By William Sidney 
Hillyer. A character monologue for male comedian. Depicts the reminiscences 
and tribulations of '*the palmy days" by one of *' the old school." Runs about 15 
minutes. Especially recommended. 

MATRIMONY— BEFORE AND AFTER. 25 cents, a humor- 

ous monologue, describing in a series of funny stories and sly deductions from facts 
more or less authentic, the hopes and delusions of the maudlin stages of love and 
courtship, and the awa.kening realities as viewed from the final standpoint of matri- 
mony. It keeps an audience in broad grins and explosive laughter for about 20 minutes. 

GREAT LIBEL CASE, The. 15 cents, a new mock trial, by Harry 
E. Shelland. 21 males. 8 leading characters and 13 jurymen (i excused). A roaring 
travesty of proceedings in court in the backwoods of Kentucky. The war experiences 
of the defendant, a bogus colonel, and the personalities of a jury of mixed nationalities 
and occupations, make this trial a screaming farce. It plays a whole evening. 

CASE OF HERR BAR ROOMSKI CONEYISKEY, The. 

(An Anarchist.) 15 cents. A new Mock Trial, by Harry E. Shelland. 27 male, 
I female (usually played by a male) characters. The latest and most amusing 
mock trial published. Good Tramp, French, German, Irish, Negro and Jew parts. 
Plays a whole evening. 

RUGGLES vs. THE PADERWHISKIE SCHOOL. 15 cents. 

A mock trial, by Charles J. Martin. Arranged for i8 male and 14 female characters 
or more as circumstances require ; the female characters are usually performed by 
males. This mock trial will keep the audience laughing every moment ; the action is 
rapid and replete with irresistible drolleries. Rugbies brings suit against the Pader- 
whiskie School for damages caused by the insufferable noise, vocal and instrumental, 
by which his rest is destroyed. Examples are performed to enable the jury to 
appreciate their excellence, giving opportunities for the introduction of specialties. 
Can be played a whole evening. 

RIDING THE GOAT. 15 cents, a burlesque initiation in a lodge of 
the *' Sovereign Union of the Emancipated Husbands," by O. E. Young. 12 male 
characters, also the wives of all of them (performed by males), and 2 attendant imps; 
associate members and their wives, ad libitutn. Time, i%, hours. The cast includes 
a Dutchman, an Irishman, a Yankee and a Darkey. The proceedings are intensely 
funny with a roaring climax. Just the thing for a club where a large cast is desired. 



One copy del. to Cat. Div. 
APf? 13 1911 



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MILITARY PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

M. F. 

BY THE ENEMY'S HAND. 4 Acts; 2 hours 10 4 

EDWARDS, THE SPY. 5 Acts; 2^ hours 10 4 

PRISONER OF ANDERSON VIELE. 4 Acts; 214 hours. 10 4 

CAPTAIN DICK. 3 Acts; 1)^ hours 9 6 

ISABEE, THE PEARE OF CUBA. 4 Acts; 2 hours 9 3 

EITTEE SAVAGE. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 4 4 

BY FORCE OF IMPULSE. (15 cents.) 5 Acts; 2i^ hours 9 3 

BETWEEN TWO FIRES. (15 cents.) 3 Acts; 2 hours 8 3 



RURAL PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

MAN FROM MAINE. 5 Acts; 214 hours 9 3 

AMONG THE BERKSHIRES. SActs; 2^4 hours 8 4 

OAK FARM. 3 Acts; 21^ hours; 1 Stage Setting 7 4 

GREAT ^VINTERSON MINE . 3 Acts ; 2 hours 6 4 

SQUIRE THOMPKINS' DAUGHTER. 5 Acts; 2}^ hours 5 2 

WHEN A MAN'S SINGLE. 3 Acts; 2 hours 4 4 

FROM PUNKIN RIDGE. (15 cents.) 1 Act; Ihour... 6 3 

LETTER FROM HOME. (15 cents.) 1 Act; 25 mmutes 1 1 




ENTERTAINMENTS 

25 CENTS EACH 

AUNT DINAH'S QUIETING PARTY. 1 Scene 5 11 

BACHELOR MAIDS' REUNION. 1 Scene 2 30 

IN THE FERRY HOUSE. 1 Scene; IJ^ hours 19 15 

JAPANESE ^VEDDING. 1 Scene; Ihour 3 10 

MATRIMONIAL EXCHANGE. 2 Acts; 2 hours 6 9 

OLD PLANTATION NIGHT. 1 Scene; I34 hours 4 4 

YE VILLAGE SKEWL OF LONG AGO. 1 Scene. 13 12 

FAMILIAR FACES OF A FUNNY FAMILY 8 11 

JOLLY BACHELORS. Motion Song or Recitation 11 

CHRISTMAS MEDLEY. 30 minutes 15 14 

FASTER TIDINGS. 20 minutes 8 

lUNCH OF ROSES. (15 cents.) 1 Act; 1^ hours 1 13 

»VER THE GARDEN WALL. (15 cents) 11 8 



aCK & FITZGERALD, Publishers, 18 Ann Street, N. 




m 13 isiv 

HORARY OF CONGRESS 




016 102 826 5 

COMEDIES AND DRAMAS ^ 

25 CENTS EACH 

BREAKING HIS BONDS. 4 Acts; 2 hours 6 3 

BUTTERNUT'S BRIDE. 3 Acts; 2i^ hours U 6 

COLLEGE CHUMS. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 9 3 

COUNT OF NO ACCOUNT. 3 Acts; 2}4 hours 9 4 

DEACON. 5 Acts; 21^ hours... 8 6 

DELEGATES FROM DEISTER. 2 Acts; 45 minutes 3 30 

DOCTOR BY COURTESY. 3Acts;2hour8 6 5 

E ASTSIDERS, The. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 8 4 

ESCAPED FROM THE LAW. 5 Acts; 2 hours 7 4 

GIRL FROM PORTO RICO. 3 Acts; 23^ hours 5 3 

GYPSY QUEEN. 4 Acts; 2}^ hours 5 3 

IX THE ABSENCE OF SUSAN. 3 Acts; li^ hours 4 6 

JAIL BIRD. 5 Acts; 21^ hours 6 3 

.lOSIAH'S COURTSHIP. 4 Acts; 2 hours 7 4 

MY LADY DARRELL. 4 Acts; 21^ hours 9 6 

MY UNCLE FROM INDIA. 4 Acts; 2]^ hours 13 4 

NEXT DOOR. 3Act8;2hour8 5 4 

PHYLLIS'S INHERITANCE. 3 Acts; 2 hours 6 9 

REGULAR FLIRT. 3Acts;2hour8 4 4 

ROGUE'S LUCK. 3Acts;2hour8 5 3 

SQUIRE'S STRATAGEM. 5 Acts; 2% hours 6 4 

STEEL KING. 4 Acts; 2»^ hours 5 3 

^V HAT'S NEXT? 3 Acts; 2}^ hours 7 4 

WHITE LIE. 4Act8; 2i^ hours 4 3 



WESTERN PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

ROCKY FORD. 4Acts;2hour8 8 

GOLDEN GULCH. 3 Acts; 2^ hours 11 

RED ROSETTE. 3Acts;2hours 6 

MISS MOSHER OF COLORADO. 4 Acts; 2i^ hours... 5 

STUBBORN MOTOR CAR. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 7 

CRAAVFORD'S CLAIM. (15 cents.) 3 Acts; 2^ hours. 9 




DICK & FITZGERALD, Publishers, 18 Ann Street, N. Y. 



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